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Steady as she goes

Her thinking is the dangerous type.

I've been thinking.
How I've been living as of late. Everything I do is to prove something to someone else.
I've never sad down with myself and said.."Hey, look. You worry about what everyone else says, does, and thinks. What I'm wondering is why you even give a fuck. I know you've always been like this, but shit...nows the time to have fun for yourself. Get to know you. Stop worrying if someone will like you, because honestly if they don't, then it's really no time wasted. You already know how funny, smart, and pretty you are. So STOP WORRYING."

And I've been realizing that I seriously don't need Logan anymore. That I never did, and that even though I was lonely, I was better off not knowing who he was. Throughout the relationship I was nothing but faithful, and in love. I may have had "crazy girlfriend" times, but that's what happens when someone moves in day 1 (yea I know) and all you want is them to accept and love you. And stop playing video games on the computer because you've been waiting for three hours. My love overshadowed everything that he had done wrong. He was immature. He was arrogant. He was heartless. No matter how many times he said he loved me, he didn't know how to. I still feel sorry for him. His childhood was no picknick, but it is no reason to treat someone who gave you everything, like shit.
I remember he kept telling me he had his own life...bla bla bla. Well if you had your own life I don't think you'd be running from the cops, and feeding off of your girlfriend for everything her, and her family has. So shut the fuck up, please?

I'm not missing you as much.
I'm not in love with you anymore, and I thank god.
I don't care how you are doing.
And I wouldn't attend the funeral service, either.

Comments

Throughout the relationship I was nothing but faithful, and in love. I may have had "crazy girlfriend" times, but that's what happens when someone moves in day 1 (yea I know) and all you want is them to accept and love you. ---Whoa, been there!!

My love for a DDSS* was so intense it covered up all his faults (dishonesty, arrogance, immaturity, heartlessness, overexcessive flatulence). I finally had to realize that I pretty much loved a fictional character I made up in my head to compensate for his lack of everything. Oh, but when I did. Yeah, that was good. :)

I think you've realized the same thing. High five, nigga.

*Dirty Douch Salad Sandwich
Steady as she goes

April 2009

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